JAMES MAPES — DEFINING “APPLIED IMAGINATION” FOR SUCCESS –

April 11, 2013 in James Mapes

This blog is the first in a series on what I believe to be a basically ignored, underappreciated and undervalued component of creativity, innovation and success – “applied imagination.”
I am fairly certain that you have heard the expressions – “What you focus on is what you receive” or “What you focus on is what you attract.”
But, what do these statements imply?
The reality is that your imagination can be your best friend or your worst enemy. It is HOW YOU IMAGINE and WHAT YOU FOCUS ON that affects your brain and, therefore, your expectations and perceptions.
You can imagine the economy tanking and make some bad financial choices by being catapulted into fear-based thinking and negative stress. You can imagine failure and resist taking the very risks that might help you learn and succeed, or you can imagine yourself failing to make a sale and negatively influence your communication with the prospect. The list of harmful scenarios can be limitless, but they all result from allowing your imagination to run amuck. When you lose control of where and how you focus, you reduce your chances to achieve a successful outcome.
Imagination is – in itself – whimsical.
Applied imagination equals creativity.
When you learn to harness your imagination, your imagination becomes your best friend. Then, you can use your imagination instead of allowing your imagination to propel you. It is ONLY when you proactively focus your imagination to achieve a specific outcome that you ignite the creative process and ramp up your odds of success. When you “apply” your imagination, you create something of value. In business it may be creating a value-based philosophy, a high-performance team or developing a product. If you are a writer, you apply your imagination to a specific subject or idea and create an article, manual or book. In the area of health, you can apply your imagination to lower your stress, reduce pain or heal faster.
As a peak performance coach, I help my clients define what they want to achieve in a specific area, stay focused and develop strategies to achieve their goals.
Here’s what I want you to do: Take a moment and consider where and how you apply your imagination – mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally and socially. Let go of judgment. The first step to understanding and applying your imagination is to become mindful of how you imagine and the results you achieve. In a later blog, we will look at specific ways to apply your imagination.
This is not meant to be superficial advice on how to be happy all the time – but rather how to be creative and productive. Do that and your joy factor will take care of itself.

JAMES MAPES 
Expert on the Psychology of “Applied Imagination,” for extreme success, Peak Performance Coach, Author: Quantum Leap Thinking: An Owner’s Guide to the Mind

BACK TO THE BASICS: GOAL SETTING TO ACHIEVE EXCEPTIONAL SUCCESS – JAMES MAPES

March 1, 2013 in James Mapes, Uncategorized

In today’s hyper-connected world it is easy to get lost in the forest of overwhelming flow of emails, social networking or just trying to complete your daily ‘to do’ list of mandatory maintenance. But goals that only keep us afloat do not help us grow. So it’s time to get back to the basics of how to set ‘stretch goals.’
We are goal-seeking creatures who sometimes forget that being busy does not necessarily translate as being productive. Goals are absolutely necessary and absolutely limiting: Fears can subconsciously manipulate us to think small, put a ceiling on our possibilities or limit us by keeping us stuck in a status quo box.
Stretch goals help lead us to something bigger. So, what is your dream? Identify it now, create your stretch goal and follow these tips to help you grow, soar and achieve exceptional success:

1. Once you have set a stretch goal, stop and ask yourself – How can I now make this goal bigger, better, brighter, more fulfilling and more exciting? By asking that question, you can recognize and break through fear, guilt and old self-limiting beliefs from the past.
2. Recognize that setting a stretch goal has a built-in possibility of failure. Prepare yourself by asking – What is the worst that can happen and am I willing to have it happen? And what steps can I take now to buffer myself against failure?
3. Make sure your stretch goals are realistic. Fantasy and reality are two different animals. Your mind is designed to seek answers and solutions. If your goal is unrealistic, you set yourself up for frustration and disappointment. When your stretch goal is realistic, your subconscious comes up with workable solutions to overcome barriers and problems.
4. Make sure each stretch goal is explicit, has a deadline and a time frame. By doing so, you set your subconscious on a course to complete a doable task.
5. Write your goal down or type it into computer. Expressing your goal in words is absolutely necessary because – it crystallizes your thinking.
6. Create an action plan. A stretch goal must be broken down into small, achievable steps. This makes your ideal outcome measurable and – you can celebrate each successful step you complete.
7. Goals must remain flexible – You must remain flexible. You change. The world changes and circumstances change. You can re-mold and re-craft your stretch goal as long as you remain true to your values. Very little in this life is achieved by moving in a straight line. We often have to shift and slip around obstacles, learn and re-learn to get back on course.
8. Live in the result. Mentally rehearse your goal – as if you have already triumphed. The success of achieving a stretch goal depends on conditioning your brain and your nervous system in advance. The reality is that you notice what you have conditioned yourself to see. Visualize, visualize, visualize clear, vivid and emotionally based mental movies or visualizations of your stretch goal at least twice a day. See your goal as already complete. Live in the result!
9. Create an action plan and take action every day. As a friend of mine says, success is achieved down in the trenches. Making it happen is neither sexy nor easy. It takes consistency, tenacity, perseverance and support.
Follow these tips and you give yourself a tremendous edge to achieve exceptional success – mentally, physically, spiritually emotionally and socially.

James Mapes is the creator of Quantum Leap Thinking™ and the Transformational Coach™. He, is a international business speaker, peak performance coach and best-selling author.

James Mapes – My Top Secret Tips for Achieving Successful Resolutions and Goals

February 1, 2013 in James Mapes

First, let’s get some facts straight. Research shows that more than 80% of us fail at keeping our New Year’s resolutions because we unconsciously set ourselves up for failure. One of the main reasons is, without awareness, we focus on the downside of not achieving their goals. That means we’re giving power to fear instead of to desire and passion.

These tips are based on the latest brain research. Apply them you will give yourself an edge for success:

1. Be honest with – you. Make sure your resolutions are not based in guilt. That includes…I should… I would if… or I could if only… All these mindsets are based in fear and misplaced focus.

2. Align your goals with your values. Check to be sure your resolutions are aligned with your values. Write down your three most important values. They will be your most deeply-held beliefs. When your resolutions are in alignment with what you believe and who you are – you will achieve results.

3. Make your resolutions realistic. Sometimes our overzealousness or fear puts the imagination on the wrong track which leads to setting standards that are unrealistic and, therefore, unachievable. When setting any goal, take a realistic look at your resources, including the time you can devote to working on your goal, the money you might need to invest and the support you might require.

4. After you make your resolution and set a clear goal, break it down into small steps. You don’t want to overwhelm your subconscious; you want to create small wins. Failure may teach you lessons but failure can also rob you of a sense of self-control. It is the “wins” of life that help you build self-confidence. Here is a fact about the chemistry of your brain: small wins actually grow the brain for success. Success really does breed success.

5. Each time you succeed in taking a small step towards achieving your goal, smother yourself with kindness and praise. Give yourself a reward. Tell yourself how proud you are of you. Believe it or not, this actually helps rewire your brain for success and builds internal motivation, self-confidence and resiliency.

5. Recognize that will-power is a finite resource. When you feel you are constantly going against the flow and always have to stay on course by willpower alone, you are doomed to failure. Willpower is a great adjunct to your mental took kit for achieving success but it actually drains the brains energy and then – eventually people go back to their previous behavior and habits. When you align your resolutions with your life priorities (mental, physical, spiritual, social and emotional), you create internal passion and give yourself a great advantage to succeed.

6. Share your resolutions and goals with people you trust. This builds accountability both from within and from outside yourself.

7. Create a positive environment for success. This includes surrounding yourself with people who are positive, believe in you and are your cheerleaders. Simply put – stay away from the naysayers and energy drainers.

By applying these strategies you will rank among the small group who do set and turn resolutions into reality.

JAMES MAPES
Expert on the Psychology of “Applied Imagination,” for extreme success, Peak Performance Coach, Author: Quantum Leap Thinking: An Owner’s Guide to the Mind

JAMES MAPES Expert on the Psychology of “Applied Imagination,” for extreme success, Peak Performance Coach, Author: Quantum Leap Thinking: An Owner’s Guide to the Mind

January 4, 2013 in James Mapes

James Mapes is the founder of Quantum Leap Thinking™, creator of The Transformational Coach™, expert on the psychology of “applied imagination,” best- selling author, highly acclaimed business speaker, consultant, seminar leader and personal excellence coach. For over 30 years, James has been an ardent student of human behavior and dedicated to helping individuals, teams and organizations identify and break through barriers to reach their goals and achieve success. He encourages people to be open to new ways of thinking, and his goal is to help everyone make the “quantum leap” toward more creative, productive and confident lives. For both businesses and individuals, his message promotes an innovative, powerful way of thinking and provides a new-found mastery over their imagination and perceptions so that, in his words, “the invisible becomes visible and the impossible becomes possible.” The results have been nothing short of extraordinary, creating key breakthroughs in both organizational and personal excellence.

James Mapes’ success as a speaker and highly regarded authority on the imagination, creative thinking, communication, managing change, organizational problem-solving, successful teamwork, leadership and coaching is due to his early training as an actor and experience as a theatrical producer. In 1969, he graduated from California State University with a Master of Arts degree in theater and speech. He then worked in repertory theater, off-Broadway and directed two of his own theater companies, amassing dozens of television and movie credits. As a performer, he developed a unique stage presence with a special talent for connecting with his audience. Mapes’ work has earned him appearances on CNN, The Today Show, Good Morning America and Fox Family Channel, among other media outlets.

James Mapes Suggested Speech Topics:

Imagine That! : Unleashing the Power of the Imagination for Success

Success literally depends on how people use their imagination. Exceptional individuals in all walks of life have the capability to think creatively and open up new opportunities for innovation. These are the individuals who have mastered the skill of visualizing a dynamic and successful future and then creating what they envision with optimism and hope. Einstein’s words have never ringed truer, “Imagination is more important than knowledge. It is a preview of life’s coming attractions.”

James Mapes, the leading authority on the psychology of “applied imagination,” demonstrates that success can be achieved by a clear understanding and application of the mind. James skillfully stretches people’s perceptions to see new possibilities and experience how their own imagination works. He guides his audience to understand that the powerful mental pictures we all carry around with us impact the opportunities we see and are the force which shapes how we thrive in challenging times.

Based on his successful signature program and best-selling book, Quantum Leap Thinking, James Mapes has created this new, engaging, practical, interactive and entertaining program, James captures and holds the audience’s attention with a compelling series of stories, demonstrations and video clips that leave no doubt that – “you can achieve what you imagine.” Participants will experience applying their own imagination to craft a personal “vision” that instills passion and motivation in – all areas of life. The audience will leave this thought-provoking, fascinating and inspiring journey learning:

? How to apply their imagination to successfully achieve goals.
? How to craft a compelling, emotional, realistic and persuasive future vision.
? How to recognize and break through limiting fears.
? How to use core values to unlock motivation.
? How to take risks.
? How to manage change for growth.

True Leadership: The Neuroscience of Effective Leaders

What is leadership–really? The business world is awash with leadership philosophies, how-to books and training institutes that can leave even the savvy manager perplexed as to exactly how to encourage employees to develop their own leadership style. It is important to push aside the clutter and get back to a fundamental understanding of what “true” leadership traits are essential for success. The adage “leaders are born, not made” is questionable, as it takes hard work to craft a leadership style that works for each individual.

In this provocative, confrontational, lively and interactive presentation, renowned performance coach and best-selling author James Mapes incorporates his legendary humor, movie clips and an array of audience exercises to reveal:

? The five core traits of all great leaders.
? Why morality, a nice disposition and power do not necessarily make a great leader.
? A road map for participants to enhance their personal leadership style and permanently transform it.
? How to craft an emotionally charged, clear and realistic future vision to motivate.

James Mapes A BETTER VIEW

September 7, 2012 in James Mapes

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“We have more possibilities in each moment than we realize.”


-Thich Nhat Hanh, Vietnamese monk, activist and writer.

What if it was possible to enhance your view of any situation at any time? It is. All it requires of you is to learn and practice a very simple skill.


If you take a moment to realize it, you have a mindset, a picture or a current view of your relationships, job, financial situation or creative project. In fact, you have a view of everything that is and will be. This current view of the situation is simply how, at this very moment, you define specific goals or expectations. This is totally controlled by your perceptions, and your perceptions are often colored by self-limiting beliefs such as guilt, fear and what you feel you deserve.


Your current view of the situation, or CVS, has a powerful impact on the choices you make because it sets up expectations.
Keep in mind: you create your CVS. Because you create it, you can create something different, something better – whenever you so choose. You can take any CVS and alter it into a better one.


Last month, for example, I was particularly busy presenting my program to business groups. While I am exceedingly grateful to be working, I was also not happy about being away from home for so many days. My CVS, or current view of the situation, was that of wading through loud and anxious crowds at the airport, staying in sterile hotel rooms and arriving back home exhausted.
That was my CVS, but I had a choice to create a better view of the situation or BVS.


I reminded myself that flying would give me an opportunity to catch up on some reading and that being alone, undisturbed in a hotel room would allow me to do some rewrites on my new book. From that perspective, the upcoming month sounded quite exhilarating. Plus, I was getting paid to do what I love to do!


I created a BVS from a CVS, and as I did, I felt my mood change.


You can do that, too. Change your current view of any situation to a better view of the situation. But, here is the catch. You need to remind yourself to consciously switch your perception and to paint a new picture.


If you practiced a martial art every day, the skill would become etched on your subconscious, and when you needed to defend yourself, you would respond as a reflex. If you repeat something to yourself one hundred times, three times a day, you will remember it when the need arises.


Here is the message that you want to pop in your mind when you need it. “Change my current view of the situation to a better view of the situation.” But that phrase is much too much to repeat three hundred times a day. So, let me make this very easy. The key phrase to say is: “CVS to BVS.”


You can repeat “CVS to BVS” one hundred times in less than two minutes. Do you think you can do that three times a day? Are you willing to invest six minutes out of your day to master a skill that can help you explode from average to extraordinary?
Give it a go for seven days. You will notice yourself becoming more aware of your choices in every area of your life. You will find yourself expanding your goals and becoming excited about your future. Most of all, you will raise the quality of your life.

James Mapes Speaking:

James Mapes – THE IMPORTANCE OF RITUAL

August 1, 2012 in James Mapes

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There are certain subjects that are ubiquitous in the field of human potential and leadership. There is a plethora of articles on motivation, productivity, creativity, innovation and on it goes. But there is one subject that has, unfortunately, been both underrated and neglected – a subject that determines the quality of life by giving it meaning and structure as well as habits, and that is – the profound power of ritual.

For his birthday each year, for over twenty years, I treat my brother to a trip to Connecticut for our yearly camping ritual. It is always wonderfully renewing and gives me a sense of uniformity. We are the best of friends and our time together reflects the joy we had in our childhood. We fish, exchange ideas and watch mindless movies.

During one of our campfire chats, I expressed my frustration about attempting to come up with a topic for my new article.

He didn’t miss a beat. “What about rituals?” he asked. “Look at what we do every year and the grounding it gives us.”

My mind took flight as we examined the rituals we take part in every day – from personal to social to business. Most rituals are so ingrained in us that we don’t even recognize or label them as such. Rituals are often rejected as primitive, unnecessary, religious or time-consuming and yet – we are the sum total of our rituals. They even impact our social health.

Social interaction and being connected to others is, according to a mass of research, one of the main keys to living a healthy and happy life.

Ritual not only determines who we are, it also creates habits -  and habits determine everything about our life experience, both positive and negative.  We fail or succeed based on our rituals. Denise Lammi and David Wojtowicz write in their article, Why Rituals are Important in Your Life: “Rituals add substance and meaning to actions and events at both the individual and social level. Rituals can also create new values and structures.”

An extremely positive payoff for ritual relates to a subject I have referred to a number of times: brain research proves that we have a limited amount of willpower and discipline. When we employ will power we literally drain our brains energy, halt creativity and hamper our ability to focus. Rituals allow us to make certain elements of our behavior routine and automatic so we don’t have to constantly rev ourselves up and push ourselves to action. When we develop positive habits, we don’t have to use up our finite supply of self-control.

The reality is: if you want to ramp the quality of your life, you may want to fold a few positive rituals into the fabric of your life. But first, you have to hit the pause button long enough to take a quick inventory of your rituals – on every level. Start in the morning and whisk through your day. What do you do when you first get up? If you’re caring for children, what is your routine?  What is your attitude when you begin your work day?

In my out-of-the-box life, for example, I usually begin my day by doing my hygienic routine and then have a cup of coffee with my wife. If I am not on the road speaking, I fire myself up by mentally, running through what I want to accomplish for the day and then breaking it down into priorities. I launch myself at my computer with a second cup of coffee, do my work and then head to the gym most days at 5 PM for a rigorous workout with a fifteen-minute meditation. Later, my wife and I read the papers and catch up on our day. Of course, we also have a ritual of seeing friends and that ritual is broken down into smaller rituals.

So, what are your rituals? They are easy to spot. Think about driving a car.  You get in, fasten your seat belt, check the rearview and side mirrors and off you go. You perform these acts without conscious thought. In a sense, a ritual is like that. In order to uncover them you have to reflect. Think about your typical day, note your rituals and without judgment, rate them on a scale of 1-5 as being healthy or not -  the score of 5 being healthy.

Asking yourself the right questions is the one sure way to discover what rituals you can change or ones that you can incorporate in your life to make it even more exceptional. Ask yourself a question and you will always receive an answer.

Questions uncover the gold of thinking.

Using your mental inventory of rituals ask yourself “What rituals would increase the enjoyment of my life experience?”

“How would I feel if I had more energy?”  and “What ritual could I do that would make me feel more energetic?”  (i.e. more exercise, a shift in the quality of food or reducing food intake). “How would I feel if I were more enthusiastic about what I do and what ritual could I perform that would make me feel more enthusiastic?”  “How would I feel more grateful and what ritual might I perform to feel more grateful?”  “How could I feel more connected to others and what ritual might I perform to feel more connected?”  “How could I feel more productive and what ritual might I perform to feel more

productive?”

In Harvard professor/author Dr. Ben-Shahar’s highly popular course in Positive Psychology, he teaches students how to be happy. One of his Eleven Happiness Tips is to create rituals.

He notes that “The most creative individuals whether artist, businesspeople or parents have rituals that they follow. This routine frees them up to be creative and spontaneous.”

Rituals are woefully lacking in most businesses because of the perception that rituals are time-consuming. This is faulty thinking. True Leaders create ritual to bring unity and connection to the team. Rituals put on the ‘pause’ button and produce a sense of fellowship by allowing others to connect to a higher purpose or larger goal.  Rituals are about paying attention and that is something we can use a lot more of – on both the personal and business level.

Here are five simple rituals that can have an enormous positive impact on your life – both personally and

professionally:

1. One of the most important rituals that you can develop is to create a gratefulness list. Simply commit to writing – every night before you go to sleep – five things for which you are grateful. In the morning, look at the list before you launch in to your day. This is a simple and extremely powerful ritual which will help you sleep more peacefully and begin your day with a positive attitude.

2. Take a pause before booting your computer up in the morning. I arrange my pens and put a note pad out. Before I make a phone call, I yet again rearrange my pens and make sure I have a blank notepad. That is my ritual. It helps me come to the present and focus. All research shows that this kind of singular focus (coming to the present) makes us more

efficient.

3. Have a monthly lunch date with coworkers.

4. Sometimes we don’t see the value of meetings.  But studies have shown that often meetings serve as a ritual for employees to sit, acknowledge one another and their work. This fuses the team by instilling a sense of culture.

5. Start your meetings by offering respect to your colleagues.

Ask for any declaration of admiration or appreciation that anyone might like to express.  It works.

Make ritual part of your conscious choice and you will take the leap to having an exceptional life.

James Mapes Speaker

James Mapes LIFE CAN TURN ON A DIME

July 23, 2012 in James Mapes

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Life can turn on a dime. I got up last Monday morning, grabbed a cup of coffee and headed to the computer with the intention to write a new article and put some finishing touches on another project. Within moments, I felt terribly sick and began to shake like a paint mixer, an out of control feeling that lasted just a few minutes before my wife insisted that we call our internist. She escorted me to her car and off we went.

As I sat there, visibly shaking, he did a few quick tests. Within less than fifteen minutes he informed us that I had to go directly to the emergency room at Bridgeport Hospital – without returning home to gather some personal items. He was going to put in a call to cardiology, the infectious disease team and what later seemed to me like an army of doctors and nurses. After all day in the ER, I was ensconced in a hospital bed where, for four days, I was on every antibiotic that existed as well as saline and pills I couldn’t identify. Day and night, people came and went, asking me questions, taking notes, drawing endless blood and on and on. They were on a mission to discover the source of the strep infection that had blossomed in my blood and threatened to exterminate me. I was one sick person.

The bottom line is that, while weeding my vegetable garden, crawling around on my hands and knees, something poked through the shin of my leg and invaded my blood where it was now growing like a wildfire. Apparently, we all carry the Streptococcus bacteria on our skin and even a small cut can create a huge issue. There are 18 groups of the streptococcus bacteria. Some can cause a sore throat while others are called the “flesh easting” virus.

The infection is now under control. I have a small “pick line” in my upper arm, and I must go once a day for an intravenous antibiotic injection for the next few weeks.

As horrific as this sounds, I am alive, grateful and count my blessings. My wife has been ever her loving and brilliant self. My physician, Dr. Peter Tortora, literally saved my life and was on top of everything at every moment. The infectious disease team was brilliant, the cardiologist involved at every moment and the nursing staff at Bridgeport hospital was attentive and caring.

Lessons learned: don’t be a jerk and refuse to see your physician when you’re sick. Have an advocate, a partner, friend or relative go with you to the doctor. Believe me – when you are sick you simply cannot absorb or remember important information in. Be flexible and don’t resist what is happening. Have a good support system in place for your life. You never know when you will need each other. And be grateful for everything!

James Mapes on ISN’T THAT INTERESTING: THINK BEFORE YOU ACT

July 5, 2012 in James Mapes

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”All emotions are pure which gather you and lift you up;
that emotion is impure which seizes only
one side of your being and so distorts you.”
-Rainer Maria Rilke, (1875-1926), Bohemian-Austrian poet

What do all these events have in common? 1) Road rage, 2) Getting a tattoo in a moment of excitement, 4) Blowing your top and shouting verbal abuse or threats at your boss, spouse, child or partner, 5) The momentary passion of having an affair outside of your marriage or relationship, 6) Borrowing money to buy a home or other material position that you could not possible repay, 7) Tweeting a picture of yourself in a provocative way or “sexting,” as it has become known by today’s youth.


All of these actions have a high potential for regret, disappointment and often – much worse. All are driven in the heat of the moment by our emotions, and all have not been well thought out.


Psychologists have always operated on the principle that we are fairly rational human beings. In fact, so have most self-help authors and workshop leaders. The thinking is based on a false assumption: that if we say a few positive affirmations to ourselves and “think positive,” all will be well.


I’m not suggesting for one moment that affirmations and positive thinking don’t have their place, but I am strongly suggesting that human beings are not necessarily rational creatures. In fact, brain sciences have given us a glimpse into many previously dark corners of consciousness. There are often hidden biases, fear-based beliefs, memories and negative self-images that prompt us to act in an irrational way.


Yet, of all these underlying subconscious forces, there is one that simply boggles the mind: that so many people make so many really dumb, self-destructive, selfish or just plain unwise choices. They were either prompted to act on a powerful momentary emotion or feeling, or they were blinded by fear. I have heard the phrase: “acting without thinking is like shooting without aiming.”


Here’s how it happens. First, an event takes place. Perhaps it’s at the urging of an influential person, or someone makes an unsavory remark to you, bumps into you, cuts you off while driving, takes advantage of you, or entices you to act with the promise of pleasure. Next, that event triggers a thought such as, “I’ll be rewarded if I do this.” Or “I’ll attack and get even.” Or “I’ll be right.” Or “I’ll be cool and, therefore, accepted by my friends or peers.” Or “I’ll beat the system.” Or “I’ll be promoted.”


Thirdly, the thought triggers an emotion, and the brain is instantly excited by a complex chemical response. You might become frightened, helpless, angry, confused or excited. Now, here is where it gets challenging. The EVENT did not cause the emotional response. It is a distant memory of some similar situation, suddenly translated and re-lived in the present. It will always be a memory of an event that took place in the past which prompted fear, embarrassment, pleasure or some other intense emotion. Our past experiences do exert a great influence on the subconscious level.


Lastly, an action is taken. It is here that one of two paths is chosen. One is dumb and the other is smart. The really dumb thing is to act in the passion of the moment with no regard for future consequences. The alternative is to make a rational choice without being swayed by the heat of the moment. The reality is that most people act out of an emotion and are the cause of their own misery. Calling your boss names, attempting to force someone off the road with your car, having an affair or living beyond your means, holds the potential of doom.


I am certainly not saying that all emotions and feelings are destructive or bad. We need them to guide us through life and to help us learn. Being positive and enthusiastic, passionate about what you do and courageous about doing it often leads to a very positive outcome. Nor am I saying that the event that triggers fearful emotions is our fault. What I am suggesting is that we do have choice in our actions.


The lesson we can learn is to become instantly aware when we are experiencing an emotion that might trigger us to act stupidly – and to STOP – then REFRAME our thinking. We can either let events dictate our negative choices, or we can control our choices by taking rational action. We can let our impassioned, negative emotions hijack our behavior, or we can learn a defensive skill, just like an expert in Aikido.


Is it easy? No. Can the skill be learned? Absolutely. I can say this with certainty because I’ve taught dozens of clients to do just that. When they are confronted with powerful negative emotions and thoughts, they – STOP – REFRAME and – then make a more empowering choice.


If you are serious about wanting to make the right choices in the heat of an emotional moment, here is a tip that will help you live an exceptional life. Look at this as a two-week experiment.


Use a journal which could be a notebook or computer. Write the following on the first page of your journal:

“Whenever I feel the powerful emotions of blame, self-pity, fear, anger, or have negative judgmental thoughts about myself or others, when I blame myself or others, or whenever I doubt myself or feel guilt or fear – I will be aware of my thinking. Whenever I feel like I’m deceiving or taking advantage of another person, or when I feel as though I’m getting even with someone for a perceived injustice, I will STOP! TAKE A BREATH, OBSERVE MY THOUGHTS and say to myself, “Isn’t that interesting?” I will immediately let all negative pictures, images and emotions go, return to the present and reframe my thinking to the most positive and healing thoughts possible.”

At the beginning of your day- every day for 2 weeks – write the date and then the phrase, “Isn’t that interesting?” This simple statement will act as a kind of “programming,” take root in your subconscious and trigger you to use the STOP! method whenever you need it. It will also prompt you to become instantly aware and bring to consciousness when your emotions are about to lead you down the path of doing something stupid or destructive.


Keep in mind that the quality of your life determines the quality of your actions. The quality of your actions is triggered by your emotions and that determines the quality of your life.

James Mapes Speaker

James Mapes on THE ART OF SELLING: LESSONS FROM THE CON

June 22, 2012 in James Mapes

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“I’m a con artist in that I’m an actor. I make people believe something

is real when they know perfectly well it isn’t.”

-John Lithgow, actor

Reader warning:  The article you are about to read contains some strange, odd and unsettling insights but, contained within this cautionary tale are a number of lessons.

I like to think of myself as an educated, well-traveled and fairly bright human being with a diverse background of experience and knowledge. Having been a student of the human mind for years, I am aware of how bias and beliefs influence our choices.  I know all the tricks of manipulation and persuasion.  I’ve studied and practiced Neuro-Linguistic Programming and I am proficient at clinical hypnosis.  I have a working knowledge of magic and have been mentored by some of the greatest magicians in the world.

I know about scams; my father was conned out of several thousand dollars.  He got a phone call that his grandson Josh was in jail somewhere in the United Kingdom. He was told that, by wiring money, he could secure his freedom.  He even spoke to an impersonator whom he believed to be Josh when, in fact, the grandson was just an hour away, safely ensconced in his own home.    “How was that possible?” I thought.  “It is certainly something that could never happen to worldly me.”


Less than a month ago, I received an e-mail with “speaking opportunity” in the subject line. This is nothing new; people have contacted me by e-mail many times asking about my availability as a speaker. What was interesting about this specific inquiry is that it was from a Bishop (what I now know to be a bogus “Bishop”), the presiding minister of an existing church in the United Kingdom. He wanted me to kick off the opening of their new auditorium and speak to a large audience consisting of community and young people from around the world. I was informed that a member of his congregation had heard me speak and, as head of a youth fellowship student outreach, had highly recommended me. They had visited my web site, watched the video clips and read my blogs. After asking for the “Bishop’s” phone number, I called him at the given number in the UK and we had a long conversation.

Although I passionately love presenting programs on the imagination and leadership, I always consider the consequences of traveling internationally. Travel used to be a joy but no longer is. And, there’s the jet-lag recovery factor to consider. Yet I decided it was worth it – both emotionally and financially. The chance to impact 600 young people from around the world spurred my passion.

I called the “Bishop” back and accepted the date. I informed him that, as is always part of an international contract, the fee would have to be prepaid and the business-class airline ticket and accommodation confirmation taken care of one week prior to my departure. He immediately sent me an e-mail verifying my hotel; the reservation was pre-paid. I also received a faxed contract and letter of agreement.

The next e-mail informed me that I would have to send them proof that I had a work permit and a visa and, if not, they could help me expedite the process. A friend of mine who offered to contact Gen. Colin Powell’s personal assistant was informed I neither needed a visa nor a work permit.

“No problem,” wrote the “Bishop”. “Just send the wiring instructions for your payment.” Being cautious, I set up a new bank account. Then the rules changed. They wanted to send a check which they guaranteed would clear before my departure.

I phoned my long-time travel agent, told him the story and, without hesitation he said, “Are you nuts?  Have you EVER heard of a church paying this kind of money for a speaker?”  Within the hour, he sent me a website to look at.  There were at least 50 testimonials from others who had fallen for the same scam with slightly different scenarios.  Then, my grandson suggested that what they really wanted was not access to my bank account, but all the information necessary to steal my identity.

Thousands of scams are pulled off every day, usually on the elderly and desperate.  Con artists are sociopaths. That means they don’t have empathy – one of the major elements in establishing relationships and selling.    They feel nothing but the need to satisfy their own desires without thought to the hurt their behavior causes.   They will take advantage of our weaknesses:  loneliness, insecurity, poor health or simple ignorance.

Yet this scam was different.  As I pondered this issue, I realized that these con artists are well versed in human nature, extremely clever and target our most vulnerable areas.

So, out of this potentially devastating experience, I reexamined the art of selling by examining how they almost conned me.

The idea of speaking to this specific group went to the core of my wanting to make a difference.  They TARGETED MY PASSION.  Secondly, they made me feel special, wanted and needed.  They TAPPED INTO MY EGO AND EMOTION.  Thirdly, they met my fee requirements and pushed the button of GREED.  They also put a deadline on my decision making, injecting a sense of urgency as well as the FEAR of not meeting their deadline and losing something.   Passion, Ego, Greed and Fear.

Scams work because we all can fall prey to wishful thinking and our deepest desires.  So, when presented with what appears to be the answer to our dreams, we don’t want to miss out.

Now, let’s flip this around to a positive.  By doing so, I will address what I call “ethical” selling.  By ethical selling I mean offering a product or service where both you and the customer win.  Ethical selling goes beyond being process-oriented or using manipulation techniques to secure a sale.  Ethical selling champions using compassion, caring and being of service.

Here are five selling strategies to help you help others to live an exceptional life:

1.) Believe absolutely in your product.  If you don’t believe in your product or service strongly and passionately, either get out of the business or find a product or service you do believe in.  Passion is a powerful force and people can instantly spot when you don’t have it.  Passion and belief go beyond words and resonates at the core of the subconscious.  We are built to respond to passion.  One of the five key leadership traits I teach in my program “True Leadership” is how to reignite passion for what you do.

2.) Ask what, ideally, the customer wants from the product or service.  Then LISTEN.  Listening shows respect. When others feel heard, they feel special and you begin to form the bond of all excellent communication – rapport.  When you listen more than you talk, you make others feel safe and taken care of.  Listening also touches us on a subconscious level.  One of the questions I ask my clients is, “If, by some miracle, your audience could walk away having learned and incorporate one lesson in to their lives, what would that lesson be?”

3.) Tell stories and frame them to make your customer feel that it is the right choice and the best product.  How is the product going to make his or her life better?  What is the value of your product?  Paint a picture with words.  Our brain is built to be moved by emotion-based stories.  Have an arsenal of stories to tell that support the value of your product or service.  That’s what I do when a potential client is interested in having me speak

4.) Be patient and never, ever play to someone’s’ fear.  Patience shows respect and allows people time to express their concern or fear. It gives you the opportunity to help someone see the value in your product or service.  This is of paramount importance when I work with my private coaching clients.   As much as I want them to learn what I have to teach, they must move at their speed, not mine.

5.) Give people more than they expect.  This holds true for both the sale and the follow-up.  We all like to feel that we have “won” by buying the product or service.  So, add something extra at the beginning and make sure you follow-up and give superior customer service.  I’m paid by the hour when I coach private clients and I always give them an extra 15 minutes free and one of my CD downloads as a gift.  After I complete a speaking engagement for clients, I always offer to write an article which supports the key points of my presentation.   The extra time I give is well worth it.

Ron Willingham, author of Integrity Selling wrote, “A salesperson’s ethics and values contribute more to sales success than do techniques or strategies.”

James Mapes Speaker

James Mapes – Motivation and Goals: Keep Yourself Charged Up

June 6, 2012 in James Mapes

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I just finished two very large projects and immediately felt myself begin to take an emotional downward spiral. “Why is this happening?” I asked myself. “These goals have been striving to complete. You should be flying high with joy.” Then I remembered the dynamics of goal completion. Once you have completed a goal, you feel a wonderful sense of accomplishment, but then – something strange happens. The absence of the pressure to complete the goal or meet the deadline or be swept away in the creative process feels – empty. The emotion almost borders on depression. It is not unusual to reflect and ask yourself such questions as, “Is that all there is?” or “What do I do now?” The reason is very simple. We are goal-setting and goal-achieving creative creatures and when we don’t have purpose, we become smaller, pulled in and less than we are built to be.

Years ago I wrote an article entitled “Keeping your Balls in the Air.” I used juggling as a metaphor for managing goal setting and keeping your motivation. You have a number of goals in process at the same time. If you are successful with one, you celebrate – and then focus on the others. If you fail, you let yourself grieve for a short period – and then refocus. In a sense, you trick your mind.

After I reread my own article, I went over the list of my future stretch goals that I’m passionate about. I picked one to pursue and immediately felt my spirits begin to lift and I’m back in the groove once again.

You might want to check to see how many balls you have in the air? You might want to include both short-term and long-term “stretch” goals. Choose five or six and put them in the order in which you want to achieve them. Remember: succeed or fail, when you have a number of goals in your future, you will always be able to ramp up your passion and your motivation.

James Mapes Speaker